


How The Blackest Heart Breaks

by Narcis_The_Monk



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Abuse, F/F, F/M, Gen, M/M, Mind Manipulation, Sober Gamzee Makara, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-17
Updated: 2018-01-17
Packaged: 2019-03-05 22:33:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 12
Words: 17,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13397658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Narcis_The_Monk/pseuds/Narcis_The_Monk
Summary: Alternate timeline idea, based entirely off a song. "Sadist" by Stone Sour.Gamzee Makara makes a friend under mysterious circumstances, and she slowly teaches him to embrace his violent nature and accept himself without the use of sopor.





	1. Chapter 1

Gamzee stared around the room. He'd reached the point of calm sobriety quicker than he thought possible. His body still ached, and it would for a while. It would ache for the sopor he would no longer give it. It was a big decision he'd made mostly alone after he ran out this last time. It was getting ridiculous, how much time he had to devote to keeping enough concentrated sopor around just to keep up with his high tolerance. It would have killed him before he could achieve the effects he had been taking it for to begin with soon. 

He remembered the interaction that made him consider it. This was long after Feferi had shown him there was concentrated sopor, long after that little pale fling left and faded back into the sea foam she rose from. He'd gotten a message from that last troll he'd ever expected. He could remember the cerulean words clearly as they'd climbed his husktop screen. 

\--arachnidsGrip began trolling terminallyCapricious--  
AG: I know your secret!  
AG: Though I guuuuuuuuess at this point it isn't a secret, is it?  
AG: :::;)  
AG: Are you there? Or are you too 8usy 8aking?  
TC: ThE FuCk yOu gOiNg oN AbOuT NoW?  
AG: Hey look! You answered! I'm actually really surprised.  
TC: CoMe oN SpIdErBiTcH, I AiN't gOt tImE FoR HoOfBeAsT ShIt.  
AG: That's 8ecause you're too 8usy 8aking that shit. Stop it and pay attention to me.  
TC: WhY?  
AG: Well, you aren't denying it, so that's a good start.  
TC: WhAt aM I NoT MoThErFuCkIn dEnYiN?  
AG: 8h there it is!!!!!!!!  
AG: Okay, spacecase. Listen closely. I. Know. You're. On. Sopor!  
TC: ...  
AG: Spider got your tongue?  
TC: HoW ThE FuCk yOu kNoW ThAt?  
AG: See, I didn't really. But now I do.  
AG: I live on the cliff a8ove your stupid 8each. I can see you 8ecause 80% of your shack is windows with no curtains. You should reeeeeeeeally fix that.  
TC: WhY ArE We tAlKiNg aBoUt tHis?  
AG: …  
TC: goat got your tongue, sis?  
AG: Whoa what happened to your quirk?  
TC: DoN't kNoW WhAt yOu'Re uP AnD TaLkIn aBoUt.  
AG: Gamzeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!  
AG: Its right there on the screen! Don't pretend to 8e stupid. We 8oth know you're not.  
TC: AnSwEr mY QuEsTiOn fIrSt mOtHeRfUcKeR. FaIr iS FaIr.  
AG: F8ne! 8ecause I think you should stop.  
TC: WhY Do yOu cArE?  
AG: 8ecause we've 8een neigh8ors for sweeps and you've never ratted me out for how I feed my lusus?  
TC: So tHaT's wHaT AlL ThAt sCrEaMiNg wAs?  
AG: You didn't know?  
TC: NaH MoThErFuCkEr. bUt nOw i dO.  
TC: :O)  
TC: HoNk.  
AG: Think you're funny, clown? I'm just trying to do you a faaaaaaaavor, but you're making jokes.  
TC: LIKE TAVROS?  
AG: Augh! F8NE! I just think it'd 8e a sh8me if you died 8efore you even got a chance to do anything!  
AG: Whatever. I don't have time for this.  
\--arachnidsGrip ceased trolling terminallyCapricious--

The interaction had been strange, and left him feeling confused. Though he never did answer her question about his quirk. He knew what happened. He moved on autopilot until he ran out of sopor supplies. He stared at the tools and moved to the windows she'd been talking about. He grabbed a bag and began gathering them to throw them out. He finished and looked out the window and waved up at her castle of dread on the cliff. He got his husktop and sat down in a pile of cushions by the large window and opened up Trollian. He still couldn't believe what he was doing when he selected the blue name. 

\--terminallyCapricious began trolling arachnidsGrip--  
TC: ItS CaUsE I'm qUiTtIn.  
TC: QuIrK GeTs hArD.  
AG: Then don't make yourself, dum8ass.  
TC: GoNnA HoLd oNtO ThE WhImSiEs wHiLe i cAn. aIn't gOnNa bE ThE SaMe aFtEr i qUit.  
AG: …  
AG: I'll still talk to you. I'll check on you too. You know, from my window. Don't put up curtains yet.  
TC: WaSn'T PlAnNiNg oN It, rIgHtEoUs sIsTeR.  
AG: You'll still talk like you right?  
TC: yeah.  
AG: You 8etter.  
AG: Idiot.  
TC: HONK ;OP  
AG: 8h shut up!!!!!!!!  
\--arachnidsGrip ceased trolling terminallyCapricious--

He had chuckled lowly and looked up out the window again. He could see a silhouette waving from a window. He waved back and went about his business. He had a lot of things to prepare for. This wasn't the first time he quit. It was just the first time he'd quit by choice. He hid things he could hurt himself with, and made sure he had food ready while he was still functioning. He wouldn't be able to cook for at least a day or two. He also made sure there was plenty to drink. Then when all was through, he sat down in that same pile and played around on his husktop. 

That was the last thing he could remember with one hundred percent clarity. Everything for the next two days was a blur of pain. He shook uncontrollably for most of it as his already cold body temperature plummeted suddenly. He'd kept electric blankets around him and tried to focus on something as he kept himself hidden in his dark bedroom. He could remember flashes of conversations, one with Karkat and one with Tavros, but he remembered staying away from one name. For some reason he couldn't talk to her. He knew what he'd sent to his friends had been mostly nonsense, so he was glad. 

Right now, in the present, his body temperature had evened out again and he'd stopped shaking. He could think clearly, and though he moved slowly he could probably type. He made himself retrieve his husktop and he brought up Trollian again. He clicked on her name and typed a slow message to her. 

\--terminallyCapricious began trolling arachnidsGrip--  
TC: the worst is motherfuckin over.  
TC: little hard to all up and move anythin though.  
TC: HATE TO ASK.  
TC: but what did i motherfuckin miss while i was out, spidersis?  
He was prepared to wait, but the response came quicker than he had expected it to. Like she'd been waiting on him. He smiled a little bit, and the laugh that tried to escape hurt so much it died in his throat. He thought briefly to call her on it, but he'd hold onto it. AG: Not much. Karkat is still a loudmouth, Kanaya still meddles, and Tavros is still a huge dork. I don't really keep up with anyone else.  
TC: good to know the world still turns.  
TC: AND THAT YOU STILL LYIN.  
AG: How am I lying?  
TC: you don't keep up with either tavbro or karkat. YOU KNOW I TALKED TO THEM.  
AG: Augh, yes. Why are you so smart now?  
TC: i always was.  
AG: Okay, so I checked with them. You didn't message so I didn't know if you were 8reathing.  
TC: your concern is motherfuckin touching.  
TC: GOT MY BLOOD PUSHER ALL A FLUTTER.  
AG: Augh when you stay stuff like that its gross.  
TC: but you was worried?  
AG: If you tell anyone this, I will kill you!  
AG: 8ut yes, I was worried.  
AG: You should feel special though. I don't worry a8out anyone!  
TC: EXCEPT TEALBITCH.  
AG: Okay now you're just 8eing difficult.  
TC: i am. til you don't say it like i'm supposed to pat you on the back. that's not how life motherfuckin works.  
AG: …  
AG: F8ne! Fine. Okay. I was worried a8out you. I'm glad you're okay.  
AG: That makes me feel gross.  
TC: WELL YOU AIN'T.  
TC: big trolls don't beat around the bush and beg for praise. THEY GET IT WHEN THE EARN IT.  
AG: You're not my moirail, Gamzee.  
TC: I DON'T MOTHERFUCKIN WANNA BE.  
TC: but i'll be your motherfuckin friend.  
AG: Deal. I'm coming over when the sun goes goes down.  
TC: i ain't gonna say no to that. ;O)  
AG: Augh!!!!!!!!  
\--arachnidsGrip ceased trolling terminallyCapricious--

Gamzee laughed and closed the husktop. She was easy to pick on. It was downright cute to know he could fluster her so easy. Just how long had she'd been been watching him? How long had he been avoiding her? He knew all about Tavros and what happened. He knew she didn't have a good lusus. A lot like his was. He knew quite a few things about her now that he thought about it. 

She was narcissistic and downright mean when she was upset. But that was because she lashed out when she was overwhelmed. Like a spider backed into a corner. Or maybe a scorpion. Fast and reckless, with the instinct to inflict as much pain as she could. They were trolls, after all. They had those wild instincts. Maybe it was a ceruleanblood thing, not letting themselves trust or even be trusted. He hadn't trusted since Feferi and him and broken up in a bad way. Maybe they could move on together.


	2. Chapter 2

Vriska came over as soon as the ground was covered in shade, and dusk meant the sun wasn't deadly anymore. He had left his room and gotten in a quick shower. Now just his room smelled like sick and sweat, and he was okay with that. The rest of his hive was surprisingly less trashed than he'd expected. The first time he'd quit, he'd tore everything apart. When he regained consciousness, he'd been bruised and cuts covered his hands, claw marks bleeding on his arms. This time he'd just been cold. He was going to have to face this eventually, as even quitting became easy. 

The knock at his door brought him out of his thoughts, and as he fought to stand up to get the door he watched as it flew open. In stepped the ceruleanblood, red shoes the first thing he noticed like always. She'd never admit it, but she did it to look like her ancestor. All her shoes were red. He smiled as he looked up at her finally. 

She huffed as she pulled a bag off her shoulder and dropped it down. He'd never been close to her before, so it amused him to learn she was taller than both Nepeta and Feferi. She had maybe an inch or two on Terezi, but she had more curves where Terezi was still a stick wrapped in sticks. Her hair was wild and its ends turned this way and that. Almost a wave. She stood up straight and confident, and her cocky grin was in place. She wore her glasses with the blacked out lens, and her metal arm was shining and pristine despite living right on the sea air. She took pride in her appearance. He remembered that. 

"Well look at you, dropping bags like a badass gamblignat after a raid. Keep doing things like that and you just gonna sweep me off my feet." Gamzee greeted her with a wheezing laugh as he stood up taller. He went to take a step and swayed on his feet. She took a step forward to steady him, and he grinned at her. "See? Already swooning..." 

"If you weren't so pale, I might believe you because I am that incredible and chivalrous. And there are so many reasons you should be swooning." She responded quickly, prepared for his sass with her own. He smiled wider at her loud, smooth voice. For someone who he could hear cackling from his hive, her voice was like velvet. Maybe he was just biased with the kindness she was attempting. "When did you last eat, spacecase?" 

"That's where you're motherfuckin wrong. I ain't no spacecase now. I'm Gamzee." He grinned as he held his hand out. The ceruleanblood eyed it before she clapped her hand into his and shook his arm. 

"Alright, nerd. Its nice to meet you. Let's get food in you." Vriska seemed to blush as she let go of his hand and started to unpack things from the bag she brought. It looked like a lot of food that was already made and some blankets. He gave her a curious look and she shrugged. "Well, if it was anything like the migraines I get sometimes, I sweat a lot. Its probably why you're keeping you're bedroom door shut. Did I guess that right?" 

"You caught me. It ain't pleasant in there." He mumbled back, and nodded. 

"Well, lucky for you, I know how to get that out. And with all the irons I have in my fire, I have just enough room for one more. Just don't tell anyone about this. Not that they'd believe you." Vriska stated as she pulled out some cleaning things from the bottom of her bag. 

"There's a whole lotta reasons why no one would believe you came to motherfuckin help me." Gamzee said with a grin. 

"Exactly. Its a good reason to be friends too. No one will be in our business like the meddlesome twerps they are." Vriska answered him with a smile. 

"We got business?" He felt the grin still on his face as he asked this question for the very first time. 

"We do now." She answered before heading to his room. He laughed and made his way slowly after her. 

 

She cleaned up and gave him food. She stayed and talked to him, and she didn't ignore him for a second. He was sober enough to feel the distrust start to nibble at the edge of fuzzier thoughts. She only helped when she wanted something, that angrier voice whispered soft lies while the voice he worked so hard to nurture slowly countered everything. 

He watched as suspicion slowly gave way and he realized she was as tense as he was. She'd never tried to take care of someone before, so she came off abrasive and braggy. Every now and then he explained she didn't need to brag, and that he was already thankful. She bragged a little less and relaxed a little more. By the time everything was clean they were at ease around each other. 

They laughed as they ate food, and at one point they moved out to sit on the front porch so he could hear the waves. She sat close to him but seemed to take great care not to touch him. He felt a small sadness in that, but he told himself its because he hasn't had visitors in a while. His ears twitched as he listened to the waves, letting the calming feeling sweep over him as he talked to his new friend. 

By the time they noticed the light on the horizon, it was too late to pack up her things. He informed her she could stay, but he didn't have any sopor. She shrugged quietly and slipped off to the bathroom to change into a large shirt he’d provided her with. He moved things to the darkened bedroom and waited outside it anxiously for Vriska so he could make sure he didn't forget anything. He didn't have anything to block the suns rays from his windows, and the day was meant for sleeping. Hence the dark, windowless bedroom.

Vriska came out in pajama shorts on under the large t-shirt with his symbol on the front. She grabbed her things, heading to his room without a word and a deep blush blooming across her cheeks. They each climbed onto the side of a pile with blankets pulled over them. They didn't say anything, both vaguely embarrassed about the sleepover they had both wanted. The next night she lingered a little before she left. When she got back to her hive, she messaged him. They talked for a long time while he sat in the window. When he said goodnight he waved, and headed off to the room. Her scent still lingered on a blanket she left there, and he wrapped it around him as he let himself admit he missed her. He wouldn't tell her though. Just like she wouldn't tell him. 

Sweeps passed and they only talked more, and grew ever closer. As he sobered up and started to accept the voices, he even talked to her about them. She told him maybe he had psionics. He realized it one night; a revelation that went off in his mind like an explosive. He had immediately contacted her. 

\--terminallyCapricious began trolling arachnidsGrip--  
TC: holiest of motherfucks  
TC: I DONE FIGURED IT OUT.   
AG: What did you figure out, clown8ro?   
TC: …  
TC: we need to address this issue motherfuckin immediately.   
TC: DON'T DO THAT.   
TC: its all up and weird as shit. insult me.   
AG: You really are a submissive glutton for punishment. :::;)   
TC: THANK YOU, SPIDERBITCH.   
AG: No pro8lem. I get to use my 8est words on you.   
AG: 8ut no, what did you figure out?   
TC: oh yeah. its about the voices.   
TC: YOU WAS MOTHERFUCKIN TALKIN ON ABOUT PSIONICS THE OTHER NIGHT.   
AG: I vaguely recall, yeah. I mean, seeing as how I was there and I'm gr8.   
TC: yes, spidersis. your ass is fine. NOW LETS GET OUR FOCUS ON.   
TC: i remember something from the schoolfed systems. A BOOK I MAY HAVE MOTHERFUCKIN SNATCHED AND KEPT.   
TC: lets not dwell on the motherfuckin past and all that.   
AG: Oh look we got a 8adass over here!   
TC: I'M IGNORING YOU.   
TC: anyway, so it says indigobloods got chucklevoodoos. that means the voices are me. BUT DOES THAT MAKE THEM MOTHERFUCKIN RIGHT?   
AG: Well, what do they say?   
TC: i'm motherfuckin better than every goddamn one. THAT I SHOULD GET MY RAGE ON AND PUT THEM IN THEIR PLACE.   
AG: Okay the first thing is true. You are 8etter than everyone else. I mean, not more than me. You're tied with me, I guuuuuuuuess.   
AG: The second thing you might want to keep in check.   
AG: 8ut I might 8e a8le to help. Sort of.   
AG: Have you ever FLARPed 8efore?   
TC: WHY'D YOU MOTHERFUCKIN SET ME UP FOR A QUESTION YOU KNOW THE ANSWER TO?   
AG: To annoy you. I don't know! May8e Toredork tried to run some gru88y game for gru8s?   
TC: babygirl, bitter don't look good on you. CALM DOWN.   
AG: I am calm! I am the calmest!   
TC: I MOTHERFUCKIN BELIEVE YOU.   
TC: so i guess we're flarping?  
AG: I need a couple days to set up 8ut yeah.  
TC: SO WHAT DO I DO UNTIL THEN?   
AG: We pick your stats and class. I'll help you. 

They kept talking about things long into the night. By the end of it, he had made a character that functioned well for him. Two days later, Gamzee Makara hunted his first troll.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one is really long, so get comfortable. Apologies in advance.

He remembered waking up with a banging on his door. He got up to get it when it once more slammed opened and he knew who the culprit was immediately. He smiled, lost briefly in taking her in, before he woke up enough to realize Vriska was asking him questions. He'd been too distracted by the fact that she'd pulled her hair back. 

“I'm sorry, I just woke up. What are we talking about?“ He asked and she laughed.

“We're going hunting! Get your ass geared up and let's go.“ She ordered and he gave a honk of a laugh, and he took the bag she held out to him. He put on the outfit without question and was surprised to see it resembled a subjuggulator uniform. It had some light leather padding in places and moved easily still. All of it was dyed a deep indigo with black accents. He smiled and headed out to find Vriska ready in her own outfit. He assumed the outfit was supposed to mimic her ancestor but it honestly wasn't very different from her usual outfit. The only real difference was the tall red boots and the large grin of excitement across her face. 

“It fits! I had it special made. The best gear really matters.“ She spoke as confidently as always did, though this time it wasn't followed by an exclamation that she was the best at picking gear. Though he had to admit she really was good at picking gear. 

"So there a story behind this?" Gamzee asked, smile spreading across his face once more. 

"Some troll owed me a favor. Irons in the fire and all that." She answered, her own grin on her face now. "Took me forever to get it though. I had to daywalk for that. Totally worth it to see you actually wearing it." 

"When did you all up and get this again?" He asked her, catching her in her little subconscious web. 

"Shortly after I came over that first--" She shut her mouth as a blush covered her face. She looked away, suddenly very interested in a mural on the wall. 

"You wanted to be my friend so motherfuckin bad..." He was starting to laugh. He watched her as he was unable to stop himself. "You went and daywalked for flarping gear. Man, that's real cute, sister. Thank you." He calmed himself to quiet hiccupy giggles. Something about the ceruleanblood staring at the blood mural with this concentrated look, like she was a critic of some kind of another, was truly amusing to him.

"If you're done, you could let me finish!" She barked and he covered his mouth with his hand. She spoke after making him wait for an entire minute as punishment. "That's not why I did it. You're not just my friend. You're my best friend and I have to make sure you don't fuck up. Flarping is hard, and you really need someone who knows what they're doing with you or you'll end up like that loser Tavros. And if we're gonna hang out, then you can't be lame!" 

"Is that your motherfuckin way of saying you all up and regret what you did and you get your worry on about me?" Gamzee asked after he let silence fill the room. She didn't speak, but she nodded. He grinned and walked over to her, and hugged her tight. "Its a start. Lets motherfuckin go." 

He didn't linger on the progress. Doing that for too long would make her feel uncomfortable having said something close to nice. She had to word it so she reflected stronger in her own mind, but he understood the sentiment behind it. He watched her from the corner of his eyes as he let go and walked to the door. She fell in step with a small smile on her face. He'd made the right choice. 

They walked for a little ways down the opposite end of the beach he stayed on. It got rockier and harder to move through. Between the new boots and being sober for once, he managed just fine. Vriska talked in detail about some sort of treasure they were after, but there were guards. Which meant they were going to steal something, but he was surprisingly okay with that. Everything on Alternia was about stealing to survive, or about greed. If you wanted to eat, you had to hunt or fish. If you had to hide, you definitely couldn't go to the market. 

There were legitimate businesses and markets, but they were frequented by the higher blood castes that were given wealth upon surviving the caves and being chosen by a lusus. As a midblood, Vriska had more options to her than say Tavros or even Kanaya. But something like this would never be sold to her, and she had no problems stealing it even if it’s just to prove a point. As a highblood, he could have simply bought it if he had wealth left. But he'd spent his all on sopor and the related gear to bake concentrated doses. That meant that he could regain his wealth and hide his shame with a few of these little ventures, and he was surprised by how much that mattered to him.

He marveled at the realization that he didn't mind committing crimes now. He'd killed and taken what he needed to survive from the land, why not take the things he wanted too? He thought about it more and he liked the idea of reclaiming his place in this world as an indigoblood, getting back his pride and making something of himself. Trolls weren't too different from some of the beasts he'd fought for sport before. He could be a troll she would be proud to stand beside. Then he glanced over and remembered his company who was still talking and he snapped back to reality. Some trolls were different than the beasts he'd slaughtered. Some were wilder, and that made them special. He smiled down at her and she stopped talking. 

"Gamzee? Did you space out again? How much did you miss?" She went from concerned to whiny, and he felt that hiccupy laugh in his chest again.  
"Well, I know we're supposed to go get this thing, and were gonna have to fight some motherfuckers for it. I bet they don't know we're coming, cause you're smarter than trying to take them head on when its just us. Even though we's the toughest goddamned team on Alternia. So you got some plan that needs subterfuge. How close am I?" Gamzee responded, trying to keep the manic little giggles inside. 

"So you ARE more than just pretty face! Yeah, that's about it. There's only three guards ever there, and that's just one more than us. Which means either one of us takes the third out all sneaky like, and then we take one of the last two...OR we could split up and each take out one, then fight the last one together." Vriska responded quickly, visibly more excited as she talked about the plans. 

"I don't know about splitting up. That's how things go wrong in all the motherfuckin movies ever." Gamzee answered. "But I guess it depends on what the guards look like." 

"One tealblood, one blueblood, and one violetblood." She supplied, and he considered the options. 

"You know their weapons?" He asked again, ears twitching as he listened to their surrounding too. 

"I know the blueblood uses fist kind, but she's fought in the ring before. So I've seen her. I think the violetblood uses bowkind, and right now its a crossbow. And I have no idea on the tealblood. I've never seen their weapon equipped." She spoke, and he knew the gambling ring she spoke of. She trusted him to tell him how she knew that. She didn't divulge how she knew the violetblood, even vaguely, which means she's probably fought them in the past.  
So they had a ranged fighter, who would probably flounder in close combat. A musclefiend that used fistkind willingly, and that kind of brute force might be a hazard. And then there was the wild card. He thought about the information he knew, and a plan started to form. 

"Alright, going with motherfuckin plan A, the violetblood should be off by their lonesome, probably guarding it from above if possible. We couldn't get to it if we don't take them out first anyway. You got a sword, so you should go in and fuck him up quiet like. The tealblood and the musclebeast are probably guarding the treasure all close like, cause they're most likely melee motherfuckers. So I can burst in, make a big noise. Maybe get some confusion on our side." He reasoned out slowly, getting excited now that he really thought about it. 

"Exactly! No one expects a raging indigoblood!" Vriska agreed, before looking up at him. He saw her own manic grin spread across her face and his blood pusher pumped a little harder. "Then when you run at one, I'll jump in on the other while they’re distracted!"  
"I'll run at the blueblood. Cause we know what she fights with, but there ain't no clue on that teal." He finished the plan in his head, and after agreeing they walked in silence for a while. When she started to slow and held a hand up, he slipped instinctively into his hunters crouch. They moved in silence to the hive almost hidden in the cliff up ahead. He could see from here there were quite a few places to enter from. He followed behind Vriska as she slinked along a darker path that winded along the cliff to a side door. 

They slipped in quietly, and the taller troll reflected on how much he missed hunting and having to move quietly to avoid his target from catching him before he caught them. The thrill started to slip into him and it let him move quicker and quieter. This armor was incredible, the more he thought on it; he didn’t think it would let him move this stealthily. They found the place they were looking for when they peaked around a corner. They were on the second floor of the hive since they went through the door higher up along the cliff path. The current inhabitants probably forgot it existed, if the cobwebs were anything to indicate. They kept going until they were a little ways from the violetblood, who did in fact have a crossbow. Down below he could see the teal and the blue, both with their backs to the violetblood. 

He had a better plan after judging the distance down below. He could make it if he jumped down onto the blueblood who had no idea there was an eager indigoblood above them. They just had to get the violetblood out of the way quieter than thought. A light in his head went off as he remembered Vriska could do just that. He looked to Vriska, pointed to the troll then to his head. He tapped at his temple and she seemed to catch on. He moved back and hid in the shadows. Vriska moved back and lifted her hands up to her head as she focused. 

He watched with fascination as the violetblood went slack for a second, before he turned around quietly and came towards them. He looked into the troll’s eyes as he came out of the shadows towards the controlled troll. There was a vague look of panic, like he was trapped in his mind and he could see the troll that towered over him. He knew what was happening, that his doom stood in front of him. Before Gamzee could let himself get too fascinated in her psionics, he lifted his hands up and grabbed the troll by his horns, twisting his neck quickly. He felt the snap he was looking for and helped lower the now dead body to the ground quietly. 

"Took you long enough!" Vriska hissed, and he looked over to see her rubbing at her good eye. That must be pretty painful. The fact that she used it so freely meant she was stronger than even she let on.

"Sorry, spidersis. How about we rain some hell down on these motherfuckers?" Gamzee grinned at her and she smiled at him. "I'm gonna jump down on the blueblood. Think you can make that jump too?" 

"If I roll, yeah." Vriska answered, amusement in her voice. 

"Alright, we got a motherfuckin plan. Lets go." He answered, and he didn't give her time to argue. He turned and walked down the hall, before sprinting in the direction towards the balcony, clubs already in hand. He used the ledge to help him leap into the air. He gave a loud roar as he landed square on the blueblood.  
There was a squawk of panic from the tealblood and a grunt of surprise from the blueblood before she went down beneath his weight. Then she gave a pained sound as the air was knocked from her. He put on a big show of snarling and roaring at the duo while Vriska jumped down and rolled neatly back into a standing position behind the tealblood. She pulled her sword out and the tealblood turned to face her, still partially stunned. Before he could see the weapon he drew, he turned back to the blueblood who was back on her feet. 

He gave that same roar of challenge from earlier, and he slammed his clubs together over his head. She flinched at the crash but she gave him a snarl in return and lunged for him. He worked at dodging her attempts to grapple him, and he slammed his clubs down on her arms and legs wherever he could as he moved with an agility that he'd always had that none had ever witnessed. Eventually he got cocky, and she grabbed him by his hair. She hauled him back but didn't have enough of a grip to do more than try to pull him to the ground. He rolled into the move and threw himself down to the ground. He used the confusion to slam his club up over his head in a blind attempt to hit her in the face. He knew he managed to when cold blue blood gushed down onto him from her broken nose and she let go of him. 

He scrambled back up to his feet and took a chance to look at Vriska. She was tied up with that teal, each with a sword in their hand, but otherwise she was fine. He turned back to the blueblood and closed his hand into a fist around the handle of his club and he threw it towards her face. He got her in the eye while she was holding her nose and he managed to knock her back a few paces. He breathed the smell of blood in and felt himself slipping over that thin knife’s edge, but this time he let himself fall over into bloodlust. He threw himself back at her, dropping a club to claw at her. He would have kept toying with her until he heard a familiar voice yelp. He turned wide, wild eyes behind him. 

The first thing he noticed was cerulean smeared across the blade the tealblood was holding, and the bittersweet smell of her blood. He dropped his eyes to her and realized Vriska seemed to be relying on one leg more than the other. He turned quickly back to the blueblood and slammed the club harder than before into the side of her head just beneath her horn. She dropped like a rock, and he turned back to the fight going on behind him. 

He watched Vriska carefully as she moved and she was definitely favoring one leg over the other, and the tealblood was grinning as he kept his same speed. When they turned again, the indigoblood could finally see her wound. Blood creeped slowly from a wound on her upper leg though he couldn’t quite catch a full glimpse of the wound itself due to her clothing. In a second he felt every inch of his body tense in the hottest anger he’d ever felt in his existence, and he let loose a roar as he charged the teal. Vriska dodged out of the way, panting and whining as Gamzee tackled the troll to the ground. His sword hit the ground and clattered across the stone floor loudly. 

"WHO THE MOTHERFUCK SAID YOU COULD TOUCH HER?!" He wrapped his hands around the other trolls neck and squeezed as he yelled down into the struggling trolls face. He tightened his grip more as he thought of Vriska's wound again and he couldn't stop the words. "You piece of shit, thinking you can raise a hand against your betters. YOU'RE NOTHING! Back in your motherfuckin place!" 

"Gamzee?" A voice called to him, and his ears twitched a little but he kept his attention on the troll gasping uselessly for breath he would not be granted.

"Gamzee!" That voice again, but louder. Closer. He turned towards it. "GAMZEE!" Suddenly her face slammed into view, and he remembered. He remembered why he was mad, and he growled lowly as his hands twitched as he froze. "Gamzee, stop. I need one at least half alive. My lusus is picky." 

He listened to her talk, that blue velvet settling over him like the ocean waves. He felt himself relaxing and he let go of what he'd been holding so tight. What had he been holding on to? He heard the gasp of air, and he looked down at the troll he was holding down again. He remembered where he was and what happened and he turned to watch Vriska. She may have been limping, but she still owned it as she walked to what they'd been after. She grabbed the painting from the wall and threw it to the ground, opening the safe behind it with the practiced ease of a skilled thief. She pulled out the small chest and used the hilt of her sword to bust open the lock. She refiled around until she pulled out a gaudy gold tiara adorned with pearls and diamonds. 

"Here it is. The Fallen Crown. You want anything?" She called over to Gamzee, and it broke the trance she had on him. He looked down at the troll who was breathing but no longer struggling. Either he didn't have anything left in him to fight, or he was scared enough not to try anything again.

"Yeah. Yeah, hold on. You got some rope?" He answered after a second, and he felt something hit him in the side. He looked down at the bundle of rope at his side and he felt that hiccupy laughter stirring deep in his chest again. He grabbed the bundle and tied the tealblood up before letting him go. He checked the blueblood, but she wasn't breathing. "So, one gonna be okay?" 

"Oh, she'll eat dead trolls too. But they have to be fresh, and there has to be one alive or she won't touch the dead ones and they'll just rot and stink up the place." Vriska answered honestly, and he had a moment of wonder at the conversations they had. “It’s an awful smell, if you didn’t know. Do not fucking recommend.”

"So am I carrying them both?" He asked, staring dubiously at the blueblood.

"Let’s take the violet. He's smaller and I want his bow. I could make the teal carry him too." She answered him, voice quieter as he walked over to her side to look through the chest.

"That would be a motherfuckin relief." His voice was a bit distant as he checked out the contents. A lot of it was gaudy, and not to his personal tastes. But eventually he found a few gold and bronze loops that were too large to be rings, and too small to be bracelets. His eyes lit up, and he lifted them up to his horns. They slid down about halfway with a perfect fit. He decided to keep this for himself, and grabbed a few of the other pieces to sell. "So why'd you want that hot mess so bad?" 

"Because they told me I couldn't own it, because I was just a lowly midblood. I wanted to prove them wrong." She answered as she looked to him again. 

"What would you have done it I hadn't agreed to this?" He asked her, grin spreading across his face again. 

"Caught a different shift." She answered with a wide toothy grin of her own. 

"Of course. Silly me, thinking you might actually all up and motherfuckin need me." He laughed, and went about going to collect the body from upstairs. He climbed the stairs and retrieved the weapon sylladexes and the actual crossbow, choosing to drop the body off the balcony instead of trying to carry it down himself. He hummed as he made his way down the stairs again lazily. 

The rest of the trip was easy. Vriska denied any help extended to her, limping along as she used her psionics passively to make the tealblood walk along carrying the body of his dead friend. About halfway back, Gamzee noticed their pace had slowed significantly. If they were going to get back before sunrise, they needed to move faster. So he spoke up. 

"Listen sister. I know you don't need my help, but I'm a little bigger than you. Let’s say you all up and hop on my back and I'll carry you back. That way you can focus more on makin this bitch follow along like a barkbeast, happy to go to the slaughter." He phrased it in a way that didn't focused on the fact that her wound was causing some problems. She made a few different faces before stopping. 

"Yeah, okay. Fine. Not like I need it or anything." She responded and he grinned, stopping to help her up on his back. As soon as she had a good grip on him, he sped up. They got back to her hive with enough time to feed her lusus. He helped her up the stairs, and they retreated to the darkness in time. She turned on the lights in her room and he took it in.

She had a daybed, and her sopor pod was shoved away into a corner and empty. There were broken eightballs and scattered flarping gear across the floor, but there seemed to be pathways in them. 

"Was you expecting me to motherfuckin stay?" He asked with a grin and she gave a groan of exasperation as she looked away again.  
"No! Okay, well. I knew we'd get back late, and I didn’t know how late. I sleep without sopor when I stay at your place, and I figured you miiiiiiiight not want it around. I can get more later. Just, shut up. Cleaning block is over there." Vriska countered before pointing to a room that was connected on the other side. He laughed and headed off to clean up. 

The warm water washing over his skin soothed his aches and he thought about what they did. He felt no remorse as he washed blue blood from his face. He watched it swirl down the drain and he felt a smile spread across his face. He had enjoyed it really. He remembered the anger that rushed through him, the sharp flash of joy when he snapped that violetblood's neck. He accepted he was meant to be violent. He just needed a way to channel it, which Vriska not only figured out but planned it for him too. She didn't shame him for his actions, even going so far as to it treat as normal. And maybe to her it was. Maybe as coldbloods they were meant to swing towards more volatile outbursts. Peace wasn’t meant for them.

By the time he turned the water off and retreated from the shower, he had the calmest mind he'd had in days. He dried off and looked to the counter where he saw clean clothes waiting for him. She got him pajamas. He felt himself smiling against as he got dressed. Indigo pants with sly cerulean stitching and a loose shirt with his sign on it. It might be one she swiped from him some time or another. He pulled the clothes on and returned to the room. Vriska looked over at him, a look he might think was relief on her face. 

She got up and made her way to the bathroom, and her limp became obvious to him again. He got up to stop her, a light hand on her shoulder stopping her in her tracks. 

"When you motherfuckin get done, we gonna take a look at that leg. Might need to stitch that one up, lil’ mama." Gamzee stated and she groaned again, making show of rolling her eye and crossing her arms. 

"What? No, I'm fine Gamzee." She huffed and he pulled her back a few steps to tilt her chin up with a gentle touch. 

"This is serious business, babygirl. No fooling around." He said again and she stayed silent and still as she let him touch her, like a frightened hopbeast ready to spring away at any second. He held his breath too, as he froze with her. 

"Serious business, you say?" Vriska asked after a second and he grinned down at her. 

"The most serious business I ever talked about in my whole motherfuckin experience yet." Gamzee confirmed, grin spreading back across his face and she nodded finally, a faint blue scattered across her cheeks as she slipped from his hands again with a nod. 

She showered quick, and when she came back out she had her hair pulled back in a braid. He smiled as he took her in. She was wearing black shorts, a blue tank top and she had finally stopped pretending it didn’t hurt to walk. She would wince with each step, but as she got closer to him and met his eyes she blushed before producing a low, whining sound from deep inside her. 

"Gaaaaaaaamzeeeeeeee. Look at it." She said, a thin smile crossing her lips as she tried to whine about attention she liked to receive. He let himself chuckle as he helped her sit down and he looked it over. The edges were ragged, but the wound itself was clean and otherwise fine. It'd need stitches, and it would scar, but thankfully it wasn't deep enough to permanently affect her. 

"Silly little motherfuckin spider. You just gonna need some stitches." He said as he rested gentle hands on her leg. She made a face at that and he watched her for a second. "You don't like motherfuckin stitches, do ya?" 

"Augh, no! It takes forever! I've got shit to do, clown!" She exclaimed as she threw herself dramatically against his shoulder. 

"You gotta sleep, motherfucker. Don't you lie to me. Besides, if we don't all up and stitch it up, it might heal in some fucked up way that makes it hurt for life. Suck it up. I'll make it fast." He grinned at her now, patting at one of her arms in an attempt at reassurance, before he rubbed his hand along her arm gently instead.

"Promise?" She asked quietly after a minute. 

"With everything I got." Gamzee answered and he felt her exhale finally. She moved away and pointed to her desk. 

"Stuff’s over there." She puffed out before flopping back onto the daybed. 

Gamzee pushed himself up and moved to her desk. He rooted around before finding her first aid kit, and he went about getting it ready. He sterilized the needle with a candle after threading it, and went back to Vriska. He got her to lay her leg across his lap so he could get to the wound easier without having her twisted in some awkward way. Though her legs around in his waist while she laid on her side blushing and staring at the wall away from him was far from what he’d call comfortable.

He warned her before he started, and he kept his promise. He placed the stitches easily and quickly, having done it to himself many times. He knew how to make it barely noticeable, and how to keep it from scarring as much. About halfway through he realized she'd grabbed onto his shirt lightly. She stared off at a wall, avoiding eye contact still and be smiled and it more as he finished up. The moment he was done, she let go of his shirt and sat up. She inspected his work closely before nodding. 

"Good work. So, you said something about sleep?" Vriska asked, and he could hear hesitation in her voice. She wanted to say something, but she was trying to think of how to say it. He smiled, knowing all he had to do was wait. 

"Well, I think we motherfuckin probably should. We did a lot tonight. Get some rest in, and plan for motherfuckin tomorrow." Gamzee agreed, and stood up. 

She hummed before she moved further up the daybed and to one side. He got the lights and moved over to lay next to her, making sure there was space between them. They laid in silence for a while, and as he was drifting closer to sleep he finally heard her whisper.

"Thanks. No one has done anything like that before." Her voice was soft and warm, like sand on a clear night. 

"The killing or the stitchin?" He asked, his voice rumbling lowly in the silence of the room; thunder in the distance.

"Defending me." She answered, before she turned over and away from him. He let it go, and went to sleep. He woke up briefly to find her pressed against his side, slender fingers clinging to his shirt. He felt that warmth spread through his chest, and he squirmed a little on the inside. But he didn't move her away. Instead, he pulled her a little closer before falling asleep. He found comfort in her presence, the small fingers curled delicately in his shirt and holding him there.

That was also the first time he knew he'd never let her go.


	4. Chapter 4

They went on many more adventures. Some involved fighting trolls, others involved traps and dungeon diving. He didn't care what they did though, as long as she was close to him. With each new kill though, he felt a hit more home in his skin. She would beam at him, something akin to pride, and it dazzled him every single time. Stardust and moonshine hid in that fanged, toothy grin and he did anything to earn them.

His hive was slowly starting to resemble the hive of a highblood. He collected new paint on their trips, Vriska encouraging his indigoblood instincts. She was the first to bring jars along, and she showed him the best ways to collect it. She was like some twisted teacher, and he appreciated it. No one could teach him better than she could have. She didn't shy away from his rages, often cheering if she saw him do something she thought was cool. It spurred him on, and he got bloodier. More violent, with the intent to kill foremost in his mind. Well, after protect. He hadn’t let hurt her as bad as their first outing. No more stitches.

The only other thing he thought about in combat was Vriska. He kept her either in sight or within range. He could sometimes feel some kind of instinct, and he would turn to defend her if she needed it. He either just stopped fighting to throw himself at her attacker, or he finished off who he was fighting quicker.

Together, they fought like a whirling mass of clubs and blades. Back to back, they could take out a room full of trolls. If he wasn't toying around with his prey, he could slaughter more than he ever thought he could. But the one with the real tactical advantage was Vriska. As he gained muscle and height over time, she used him to jump off or even just bounce off of in general and into her enemies. There were a few times when he'd tossed her into a cluster of enemies, before charging in himself and cleaning up the trolls she left injured in her wake. 

He loved every trip out, every time he saw her splattered in blood and holding the spoils of their adventure. With every conquest, she stood a little taller, believed she was better. She was better. She was the best thing on this motherfucking planet, and he told her every day. He fought for her and beside her, and he always had her back. He trusted her with every inch of his being and she trusted him. She told him all the time, in little secrets shared or quiet touches on the beach after a fight. Together, they made a name for themselves. He knew they could do great things in the future, maybe even fix this world they lived in. Or maybe they could run from Alternian rule together.

Then came talk of a game. First Karkat, then Terezi, then Tavros...each approached Gamzee about the subject. Slowly through all their combined friends they were roped into playing a game called SGURB. It was a pain in this ass, but he figured out what was going on. Karkat, Terezi, and Sollux all explained it in detail then shrugged him off while he played on like he was still just as doped up as he'd been sweeps ago. Some twisted test to see if anyone caught on; they never did. He found out the supposed order of entering the game, and he told Vriska. She insisted on a little psychic manipulation when she found out she was supposed to enter with Tavros. Days later, they were told things changed. Maybe Terezi's complaints about Tavros being stuck with Vriska made them think they decided it on their own. 

Entering the game was strange, complicated, and a little bit of a hassle. They'd had to manage portable husktops to help build each other's hives taller while they fought off creatures he'd never seen before. Both him and Vriska wore their FLARPING gear; Vriska had added a feathered hat as a joke, and Gamzee had had a special helmet with a skull guard in the front. No more black eyes or broken noses. The enemy went down easy, even with the seagoatsprite that flew around him; his lusus was just as useless in death as he was in life. The real gift he’d given Gamzee had been showing up one last time before he died.   
He kept in contact with Vriska as often as possible, letting her know how he was doing too. As soon as they were in the game, and they were together again, he finally felt a panic he hadn't even been aware of settle down in him. He ran to her side, and when he got there he swept her up in his arms. He felt her throw her arms around his neck as he spun them in circles. She laughed, the sound like wind chimes in the breeze compared to her forced cackle, and he felt that warmth glow and grow and spread throughout his being again. She was safe, she was still there.

He slowed down their spinning, and then he pulled back enough to press his lips against hers. She stilled in his arms, but returned the gesture. They broke apart and he set her back down, immediately retrieving his clubs and gesturing her onward with a manic grin.   
“Queen goes first.” He had teased her, and she grinned at him once more.

They got through the game just as easily as they got through their FLARP sessions. They were a dangerous duo, the psionic armed pair that killed without thought or reason beyond the other's safety. He had grown quite attached to her, and he felt her so wrapped up in his soul that he knew if he lost her he would no longer have control over himself.

Then Aradia appeared in the middle of a celebration in the Land of Maps and Treasure. The metallic skin of her robot body glittered in the light and caught Gamzee's eye, and he stepped forward and in between her and Vriska. He lifted a lip as he snarled at the dead troll, but a gentle hand on his arm settled him as the ceruleanblood walked around him. Aradia watched with solid red glowing eyes, the blue of her false blood and symbol glowing even brighter than the orange red orbs. Of course Equius had emphasized that.

"Well if it isn't Megido. What brought you crawling back here?" Vriska mocked her, and Gamzee shifted into a stance, prepared to fight the possible threat. 

"A score to settle." Came the cold, hollow voice of the ghost through speakers like the manufactured voice it was.

She lifted a hand and gestured to Vriska before flinging her arm upwards. Before he could stop her, the ceruleanblood was tossed in the air. Aradia retrieved her and got in a couple punches to her face, before Vriska managed to get away. She tried to punch at the dead burgandyblood, but being made of metal put her enemy at an advantage to Vriska's attempted blows. Aradia grabbed her by a horn and tossed her to the ground, and she slammed a foot into her side once she was down.

He saw rage red the moment she flew into the air, and with each blow he felt himself moving. He moved quickly, equipping his clubs and running at the intruder. He lifted a club and swung it. It connected with one of her metallic arms and sparks shot out briefly. He grinned his manic grin as he jumped back. 

"Look at you, steppin out of motherfuckin line. Little rustbitch, pretending to be something you're all up and not and ain't got no right to be. Thinking you could lay...A MOTHERFUCKIN HAND ON A QUEEN?!" He lunged forward again. She swung a fist, and he brought a club up and against that same arm. More sparks shot out and Aradia stepped back. Her face gave no expression as she disappeared again, as unexpectedly as she had appeared.  
Gamzee moved quickly to help her up, checking her out. Vriska pushed his hands away with a blush across her cheeks, before eventually whining for him to look at them. Which let him know she really was okay, and he brushed light kisses over her bruised eyes and busted lip before letting her go. 

As soon as she regained her train of thought, she started talking about something called a quest bed and how she had to get to it. He was quick to agree because she demanded it, and he would follow her to the ends of the galaxy. She spoke of harsh whimsies, of Gods and tiers and powers unique to each of them. About wanting to find Gamzee's next so she could make sure he was safe at all costs. He felt that warmth again, and this time it bubbled through his limbs and made him feel weightless as he walked along after her. 

They followed a map that she'd found in some dungeon they had looted in her land. It led them through jungles and caves and across long shaking bridges to a temple. Inside was a large orange slab, with a yellow sun on it in glittering mosaic tiles. Vriska squealed in delight and pumped her cybernetic arm into the air. She dropped her gear and climbed up onto the slab. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Letting the energy flow through, he guessed. She loved taking in the find. 

"Alright, soooooooo...there's a catch. In order to do this, I have to die." She spoke before she opened her good eye and gave him a shy smile that made him swoon while his skin crawled. She couldn't possibly be asking him to... "You trust me, right? You promised you trusted me." She was pleading now that she saw his hesitation. Even if he did know she would be back, how could he live with himself? 

Then he felt it. The tug at his mind, and his hands moving as he took slow, jerky steps toward her. He knew what she was doing, and he felt the panic set it. She still had the subtlety of the battering ram sometimes. He often regarded it with fondness; this was not one of those times. His eyes glowed purple and he fought her off with his own psionics. He was within arm’s reach of her now. As she pushed even harder, he felt something in him snap, and he let loose a roar as he lashed a clawed hand out. He felt flesh tear beneath his claws easily, and cold blood on his hands. His hands grabbed a hold and he twisted. He could hear a gurgling sound, and he focused on it. 

He slipped back out of the rage to find himself pinning Vriska down on the orange slab by her throat. Blood poured from the lacerations across her throat. Oh no, on no no no no what did he do? He scrambled around and pulled her head up into his lap. She wasn't dead yet, but she was so close. She focused hard and he felt his hand moving as he traced words in her cerulean blood. He didn’t fight this time.

'Its 8kay. Let me go. 8e right 8ack.' He read the words as he wrote them, and he felt himself crying now. Great heaving sobs like he hadn't cried in sweeps, and he leaned down to press soft kisses between her horns before laying her out gently and stepping back. Something in him clenched as he heard her give a single long, rattling release of breath. He tried to stop himself from grabbing her body, but he found himself moving forward. He stopped when the slab started glowing and he fell to his knees in awe instead. 

A soft orange light filled the temple room, and Vriska levitated up into the air. The glowing slowly climbed her body from her feet up, until she was a solid white hot light he had to squint to look at. Beams of light moved off her now, like long ribbons wrapping along her body and consuming her, before the light turned blue and grew to fill the whole room. He had to close his eyes eventually, hands lifting to try and help block out the light. 

Then the light receded back into the stone slab, crawling back in like a monster that had been fed its sacrifice and found itself satisfied. There she laid, in orange robes with yellow suns. He scrambled to her as she set up and blinked her eyes. He got her in his arms and pressed kisses and soft, whispered apologies across her face before she stopped him and made him look her in the eyes. He noticed she had them both and he felt that same awe sweep over him. God, she was beautiful. She always was, but here she was all moonshine smiles and confidence. He fell for her all over again, like he did every time she looked at him like that.

"Gamzee, listen to me. It’s okay. You did what you had to, and don't ever fucking doubt that gut feeling. Don’t you ever doubt any part of yourself." She told him before kissing him and standing up. She looked over the new clothes and groaned before retrieving her gear bags. She found her old equipment in her syalladex and reequipped them with some hassle. It was when she was back in her normal attire, he noticed her blue glittering wings. He reached out to touch them and smiled when glittering rainbow fairy dust scattered across his grey hands.

"If you trying to hide what you done did, you might wanna do something about them wings you never motherfuckin had til now." He laughed lowly as she spun in a circle, trying to look at them before she levitated in the air. She yelped and dropped back down to the ground. She closed her eyes and focused, and the wings disappeared. She pulled her rocket boots back on, and smiled at him before adjusting her hat. 

"Come on! We have to get yours next!" She grabbed his hand and pulled him along, not flinching at the fact that her own cerulean blood was still staining his hands. 

That was the first time he lost her, and it almost tore him apart. He could feel something in him dying, something that kept him running and going forward. He knew it had to do with her, and how she made his head fuzzy and his heart light. How her voice could soothe any anger he held, how he would follow her anywhere, do anything. He loved her with everything he had, and he'd keep her safe. He promised he would, and he'd keep it. She couldn't die, he wouldn't let her. And now the game wouldn't let her either. She would be okay. She'd be fine. She had to be. 

She was the strongest troll he motherfuckin knew.


	5. Chapter 5

Ascending to his god tier had been ridiculously easy. Once more, their enemies never stood a chance. Vriska implemented her rocket boots more, using them to propel herself into the imps instead of using Gamzee to kick off of. Her new found ability to levitate helped her steer more now. His muscles were thankful, though he did miss the control it gave him. More than a few times, she ended up surrounded at a disadvantage. He would concentrate and focus his chucklevoodoos, increasing their fear until some would break away screaming. He would gut the runners, eyes glowing purple through the eyeholes of his mask, while she finished off those that froze in place. 

They reached his temple and made it through the trap systems easily, having had a lot of practice in their adventures on Alternia. They got to the central chamber, and there he found his quest bed. It was a deep, dark purple glass with a swirling light purple symbol that made him think of a face that looked like smoke trapped in the dark forever. He smiled at it, finding humor in it. He dropped his gear like Vriska had, and climbed up into it. He could feel the energy pulsing off it as he stretched his arms out and clenched his hands. He could feel emotions ebbing and flowing around him and along his skin and he looked to Vriska. 

"So there's a motherfuckin catch. You gotta do the honors. Fair's fair, right?" Gamzee asked her, manic grin in place once more. 

"Sure. And since I know it works--" She answered, before she cut herself off and retrieved a dagger. 

"You didn't motherfuckin know if it worked?" Gamzee asked, astonished. 

"Well, not entirely. But it did!" She exclaimed before she climbed and walked over to him. He dropped his arms, ready to provide no fight in his necessary death. But he kept talking. 

"Lucky I motherfuckin trust you with everything, lil’ mama. Otherwise, I'd have had to up and go find your spirit just to punch you right in your pretty little eyes." He was laughing as she walking over to him, while she was leaning against him and standing up on her tiptoes. 

"You think my eyes are pretty?" She asked, voice teasing and needling. His smile softened momentarily. 

"Babygirl, all of you is motherfuckin gorgeous." He answered before pressing a kiss to her lips. 

"I've got a secret." She whispered, and his eyes lit up. 

"Oh yeah?" He asked, ears twitching lightly. 

"I'm soooooooo red for you." She was blushing, and he could see the glint of the dagger in her hand. He smiled and tilted his head up for her. 

"’Bout goddamn time." He joked, laughing as he felt the blade cut through the tender flesh of his neck. He smiled as he felt her hands, both soft and tender as they helped lower him to the ground. He pushed her back with weak hands when he was on his knees. He held his hands out, palms up for as long as he could. He closed his eyes and prayed as he felt colder than he'd ever felt before, and his body shivered violently as he offered himself in sacrifice to the Gods of this game. 

He could feel himself lift into the air as he released his last breath, and the rest Vriska told him when he revived. Soft lavender light filled the room as the slab starting glowing from where his blood hit the slab, and the light shifted to something like those lights they saw in the sky back on Alternia in the winter. Soft, shimmering, and the color of miracles danced on the walls as he levitated into the air. That same white light consumed him in ribbons and layers, blinding her briefly as she watched carefully. When she could see him again, he was laid out in soft purple pajamas like he was sleeping.

She had rushed to him and helped him up as he took in a deep breath. He looked up at her, before letting a smile spread and he leaned over to kiss her. He got up, feeling power coarse through him with every movement as he reequipped his mask and subjuggulator armor. He felt the shimmering wings on his back and tested them out. They opened and he lifted easily into the air. He focused and made them disappear while he remained levitating before lowering himself to the ground. That could be useful. 

They left to rejoin the others. He learned that the game gave him powers similar to his chucklevoodoos. He could manipulate the suffering in his companions and help ease their minds so they could fight better. With Vriska's prompting and plotting, he helped everyone during the fight with the black king. It was a long and hard battle, but in the end they won. 

But just as they were about to claim their prize, something went wrong. An unexpected enemy came out of no where, and Aradiabot threw everyone onto a meteor and propelled them off through space. In all the movement and confusion, he didn’t know what happened until much later. Things got significantly more difficult from there on out.


	6. Chapter 6

On the meteor, time together was harder to get. Karkat had found what had gone wrong, and was trying to make everyone troll the pink apes who had ruined everything in some sort of petty revenge. Vriska and him sat side by side at the husktops. They secreted conversations around Karkat's constant squawking and Sollux moving begrudgingly around the room as he repaired husktops. 

The others noticed they got along, but no one approached them or tried to call them out. They figured if it kept him entertained and Vriska distracted, they'd leave it alone. And when they did manage to steal away to the quiet sanctity of one or the other's room, they cuddled up in a pile and plotted. 

Vriska had both of them convinced they could beat Bec Noir, as they'd learned he was called, if they worked together like they had with the black king. Then he went through and cut up all of their dreamselves, and he hesitated. The only good thing that came of it was Aradia god tiering. Though being revived had changed her, and he couldn't stand being around her. For a lot of reasons, but her incessant cheer and wide grin got on his nerves more than her complete and total apathy, or her cruel attack on Vriska in the game. Their encounter in the Land of Maps and Treasure meant they were already estranged at best. 

Vriska plotted more, and he took on the task of pointing out holes and possible consequences, helping her iron it into a suicide mission that had a decent probability of working. She expressed doubts about having to kill their friends if it came down to it, and he gave her the same advice she'd given him. 

"Don't motherfuckin deny any part of yourself. You killed me on my quest bed, you can do anything motherfuckin thing you need to. If they try to stop you, you could take them. Could take ‘em all. We both could." He answered, hand running absently through her hair. 

"Even Tavros?" Vriska asked, teasing him about past crushes. He poked her and pointed out her brief interest in him too. She stuck her blue tongue out at him in a display of disgust and poked at his chest. "Augh, don't remind me." 

"Motherfucker, I could kill him first. A shitblood like him talking down on my most righteous right hand? Fuck him. Someone needs to put him back in his meek little place." He grumbled in response as he tugged lightly at her hair in response to the poking. "I might kill him anyway. Just because he was looking down on both of us. Talking to me like I was kind of wriggler, still all doped in the head. He never did catch on, so he's an acquaintance at our motherfuckin best terms."

"Flattery will get you everywhere, Gamzee. He really is weak. He'd probably impale himself on his own lance before he even got close to me, he's so dumb. And those metal legs have him falling all over the place. How hard is it to just stand still?!" She was ranting now, trying to build herself up. He fed into it, grin across his face. 

"Sister, you could fuck his day up just looking at him! You got all your irons in your fires, stoking and turning them to get it just motherfuckin right. You know everything ten steps ahead of him, he won't stand a chance. None of these motherfuckers would." He encouraged her, using his powers to help diminish her doubts in herself. It did have its uses. 

"Yeah! Fuck these idiots! This plan will work if they just listen. And if I have to, I'll just make them listen." She sat up, excitement making her light up in way that captivated him. 

"I can help. I can go begging like some sorry mess to fishbitch, asking for some of that pale lovin’ I can see her itchin’ for. Get in good with her again. Means I might get her, the pissblood, and the violet bulge-ache in one goddamn go. Little subtle pushing and pulling of the mind can get you anywhere in this motherfuckin game." Gamzee offered, rolling over onto his stomach. 

"Okay, yeah. I'll try Kanaya, Terezi, and...augh...toredork. He's a pushover. They should listen if I whine enough. It’s always worked before." Vriska continued, crawling over to lay across his back. He could feel her press her face into his hair and he smiled. A soft purr escaped him as he took in the weight of her, and her scent of citrus and energy. He appreciated these small moments the most. "But there's still, like...three trolls I don't know what to do with." 

Gamzee slammed his brain back into plotting, the purr dying off as he thought of who was left. There was the squawkgaper, their very own musclefiend...and Nepeta. He remembered the few fleeting moments he had of being with her. 

"Equius ain't gonna listen to you because he’s an ignorant motherfucker who doesn't know how righteous you all up and is. But he likes orders from a motherfuckin highblood. And Karkat likes thinking he came up with plans, so if he thinks he thought it..." He offered a wide, sadistic grin. "And if we get both of them, we got Nepeta. Because she's so far up Karkat's waste chute, she'll do anything he says. Plus if her sweaty blue-blooded backs it, she'll comply. If they both do...tadah." He moved his arms in a mock revelation explosion. She laughed softly, that not-cackle laugh he treasured so much. 

"A genius and a pretty face. When in the fuck did that happen?" She teased him, pushing lightly at his head. He laughed and thought carefully. 

"Shortly after you motherfuckin mocked me for you peeping on me in my own damn hive like some sort of creep." He offered and he laughed when she slapped playfully at his shoulder.

"Oh shut up! You're glad I did!" Her voice was loud and mocking, but her eyes shined with affection. 

"You finally motherfuckin admit it, after all this time done passed us by. You thought I was cute and you messaged me first in some sort of desperate attempt at a red gesture." He grinned, turning over to look up at her. "Don't motherfuckin worry. I'll take it to the grave." He lifted his finger to his lips in a shushing manner and laughed as she punched his shoulder. 

"You better." She laid back down on him and closed her eyes, humming softly. "Red for you." 

"Red for you, lil’ mama. Now and always." He wrapped his arms around her and they fell asleep. 

That was the last time he held her. He awoke alone with his skull mask huskphone flashing.


	7. Chapter 7

He scrambled out of bed in a mild panic and got his gear on, noting Vriska's was missing with her. He opened the pesterlog and read as he got ready, hoping it wasn't just somebody wasting his time. 

\--arachnidsGrip began trolling terminallyCapricious--  
AG: Soooooooo........ little complication.   
AG: I went to go talk to Terezi a8out the plan, and she wouldn't listen to anything I said.  
AG: Fussyfangs was too 8usy talking to that snarky human.   
AG: So, I went to talk to Tavros.   
AG: 8ut apparently Terezi opened her wide mouth to him, and he tried to fight me.   
AG: And I killed him. Sta88ed him with his own lance. I was actually pretty on point.   
AG: …  
AG: Now Terezi is after me in some sort of pretend justice grub game. 8ut I'll meet you on top of the meteor like we talked a8out.   
AG: And watch out for Eridan.   
TC: what the motherfuck happened while i was sleepin?   
TC: AIN'T MOTHERFUCKIN FAIR TO START WITHOUT ME.   
TC: i still need to talk to the fuschiabitch?   
\--arachnidsGrip has become idle!--

He waited for a minute, but a response didn't come. He closed the log and got the rest of the necessary things. The first thing he noticed was the iron smell in the air. Blood, and a lot of it. He followed the scent, ears twitching as he heard faint screams. Those might be just in his head though, and he continued on. He used the portal to the computer room where everyone else spent most of their time. When he got there, that same smell of slammed into his face like a large invisible fist and he looked around at the chaos the room held. 

Sollux sat slumped up against a wall. His glasses were knocked from his face and his mutated eyes were eerily dark. Gamzee moved over to check his pulse before he saw the gaping wound in his chest. He didn't need to check, he was dead. He ran his hands through the blood that pooled on the ground around him and he painted smiles onto his armor with a grin. He had to show the Gods his amusement at this turn of events.

He turned to look at the next body, and a small part of him broke when he found Feferi wide eyed and staring at the ceiling. She had the same gaping hole in her chest. He reached down and brushed gentle fingers over her face, closing her eyes and painting her face with her matesprit's blood. He collected her blood and painted frowning faces on his armor, his mourning of what was and what may have been again. 

He could see a pool of jade blood as well, but Kanaya was nowhere in the room. He painted long jade streaks down his arms before he started moving stealthily through the halls. He had to meet Vriska, and he wasn't going to let anything stop him, not even the dead.


	8. Chapter 8

He had made it halfway up when he found Tavros. He gave a frown of disgust but still slapped a bronze hand print onto his chest before moving on. He hadn't found Kanaya, Karkat, Terezi, Equius, or Nepeta yet. They could still pull this off. He pushed on harder, moving quicker with a faint feeling of fear. Like he had to stop something from happening. His huskphone flashed and he stopped to open the message.

\--arachnidsGrip began trolling terminallyCapricious--  
AG: H8y Gamzee, I m8y have fucked up. I really wish I could see you.   
AG: In case I'm not here anymore, I just wanted to tell you I'm so red for you.   
AG: I'm glad I was the creep. I'm glad I talked to you.  
AG: I'll see you again real soon though. I saw it.  
AG: I w8sh I kissed you one last time.   
TC: WHAT THE MOTHERFUCK YOU ON ABOUT?   
TC: you best be there when I get there, cause I will break every motherfuckin head on this MOTHERFUCKIN METEOR IF THEY EVEN THINK OF TOUCHIN YOU. you fuckin tell them if they getting close. YOU ALL UP AND TELL THEM THE HELL I'LL RAIN DOWN ON THEM!   
TC: SING IT, SISTER.   
TC: i'll be there soon.   
TC: JUST HOLD ON.   
\--arachnidsGrip has become idle!--

She didn't answer him, and he felt the panic set in again. He closed the log again and sprinted down the halls and scaled up steps easily. It was getting harder to breathe, and he felt himself slipping into that state of mind of a highblood. Nothing was a higher priority than his own goals. He could see the vague image of a troll in front of him. From their height and how easy they were to push aside, he would have to guess Karkat. He could just barely register the screeching voice as he ran. 

As he moved through the halls he became aware of a second set of heavy footsteps. From the pace he knew they were running too, and he could smell the sweat before he could see him. The indigoblood shifted into a hunting stance. He kicked off the ground and launched himself up off the ground. He extended his leap with his powers and turned around from where he stood on an isolated and elevated platform. 

Equius stood down below, waving up to him. He hadn't broken a heavier sweat than his usual one, and he seemed to be trying not to make eye contact. Or maybe he was looking for something. Gamzee took a second to look around the room as Equius finally addressed him. 

"I was instructed to retrieve you, as you seem to not be of sound mind." The bluebloods voice was steady as he spoke and Gamzee felt a grin of self righteousness rise up in him. 

"Brother, I am of the most sound motherfuckin mind. I know where I'm going, and what I'm doing. Ain't no fault of mine you wasting your time chasing me just cause some mutantblooded freak said so." He gave a mocking innocent shrug, as he held his arms up in a gesture of idle curiosity. "Why you doing that anyway? Wasn't you just houndin’ me back on Alternia to talk down at you like the lowblood you is?" 

Equius gave a look of confusion and shock, and honking laughter took over Gamzee. He let himself slip over to the merciless side and he pointed at the sweating musclefiend as he giggled. 

"CHANGIN YOUR TONE NOW, AIN'T YOU MOTHERFUCKER? YOU DON'T LIKE THIS AS MUCH AS A LOWBLOOD TALKIN DOWN ON YOU." He leaped down off the platform. A flash of green in a vent got him to smiling as he pulled his clubs out. He twirled them idly in his hands before his started juggling them, then he raised himself to his full height as he made eye contact.

"Fuckin disgrace. MAKIN ME WASTE TIME TEACHIN A LESSON." Then he lunged, clutching a club and slamming it into his knee cap. As he twisted to stand behind the blue-blooded who was forced to kneel, he grabbed him by his hair and slammed his face down into the ground. He kicked back away from him, flipping to stand on his feet. He looked around and smiled at the broken bow Equius must have dropped or lost. He picked it up and walked over to him. He looped the string around his throat lazily. 

"See, I got a point to this bullshit. YOU BEEN TALKIN DOWN ON ME AND MY GIRL LONG ENOUGH. We don't motherfuckin need you. NOW LOOK UP." He grinned as Equius complied quickly. Gamzee nodded his chin toward the vent above them and leaned down. He held each end of the strong bowstring in his hand as he whispered to the troll in front of him. "Now smile for your little bitch. We both know she's watching." 

He tightened the strings as he stood behind him, watching him smile and stare at the vent Gamzee had pinpointed. As he finally pulled the last breath of life from him, he kicked his body away and watched him. His ears twitched at the faint sound of rustling and a sob, before the vent flew open and a blur of green was sprinting on all fours at him. He jumped out of the way, but she caught his helmet with her long hand blades, and she jerked it off him as she landed behind him. 

They both spun around to face each other and he grinned wildly at her. He had hunted with her ages ago, and he remembered her agility. He had to let her fuck herself over, because just like everyone she got cocky. She lunged at him, and he twisted and dodged her attacks easily. He batted them away with his clubs as he hopped backwards to keep her chasing him. Just like a cat to get caught up in the hunt enough to forget what they were hunting. 

She shot a hand out and managed to rake her claws across his face. His indigo blood ran down into his eyes. When he caught her wrist in his hand, it had been pure luck. He yanked her closer as he twisted her wrist. He felt the bones break beneath his hand as he first broke her wrist, then kept twisting til he broke her arm as well. She screamed at each break, and again when he tossed her by the shattered arm over close to her moirail. He walked slowly over, twirling his clubs again. 

"Don't worry, you getting the moirail special. I'll kill both you motherfuckers together so you can see him right away in the Dark Carnival." He laughed maniacally as he brought both clubs up over his head as she reached for Equius, and as soon he saw that she was about to take his hand...he slammed his clubs down into the base of her skull. He felt her neck break, and he nodded. He had made tried to make sure she didn't suffer as much as he had made Equius. He had liked her more. He wore their paint from battle. He retrieved his helmet and put it back on. The screen looked like it had some fine spiderweb cracks but he could still handle it. He didn’t have any new messages, and he turned to start back down his path just as quick as he had been before.


	9. Chapter 9

He was most of the way up when he found Eridan and Kanaya. He burst through a door as they were having some kind of stand off. They turned to look at him, and he could see Eridan's face revealing shock as he realized what stood in front of them was a sober subjuggulator on a warpath. The indigoblood starting growling as the jadeblood turned to side eye him. She used her lipstick before twisting the base to produce her chainsaw, and Gamzee chose the moment she leaped at Eridan to dart past them. Violet blood splatter across him as he made it past her arcing chainsaw just as it slammed into the seatroll's side.

Gamzee turned to see him cut in half and he laughed uncontrollably as he sprinted up the stairs. He could hear Kanaya chasing after him now, most likely spurred on by Karkat's prompting to catch him as well. He could see an open air vent at the top of the stairs. When he got there, he leaped up into it with the help of a flash step. He crawled into it before Kanaya could snag one of his ankles. 

He could hear her running along to the top of the building. One advantage he had in the vents were that vertical climbs were both easier and quicker. He climbed up them up as far as they went and climbed out. This had easily given him and advantage on Kanaya and Karkat both. He assumed Terezi must be close by from what Vriska had told him. 

The rest of the climb was made in no time at all. He could smell Vriska and he got excited. He whooped and he hollered as he flew through the door to the top of the meteor. He could see a figure in the distance, but he could also smell the heavy scent of blood in the air. He darted to the figure, but as he got closer he noticed there was someone else there. But they were dead on the ground at the other's feet. And the distinct bittersweet smell weighed him down more as he got closer.

When he got close enough and confirmed his fears, he let loose a roar that shook his entire being. He ran over and shoved who he know knew now was Terezi to the side. He pulled Vriska's bleeding body into his lap. He pressed kisses across her face, and tried futilely to give her that kiss of life the game had had before. He knew it wouldn't work, but he tried again and again as he shook and sobbed. He kept his arms tight around her as he begged her to breathe, begged her to look at him. 

When none of this worked and he'd settled into a silent cry, tears streaming down his face as he rocked her and held her close. Then he remembered who was here was them, and that growl started up again. He looked up at Terezi, his movements twitchy as he eyed her carefully. 

"What did you do? WHAT DID YOU MOTHERFUCKIN DO! She can’t be dead. SHE GODTIERED. SHE CANT BE FUCKIN DEAD!" He screamed the accusations. He kept the dead girl in his arms close before he laid her out. He stretched her legs gently out and crossed her arms on her chest. He pressed a kiss to her forehead before he stood, clubs in hand, to look at Terezi before he whispered. "What did you motherfuckin do?" 

"I had to! She would have led Bec Noir right to us and he would have slaughtered everyone!" Terezi defended herself, finally breaking her of the holier-than-though stance she'd been frozen in for so long. 

"THEN WHY THE MOTHERFUCKIN IS SHE STILL DEAD!?!" He shouted. There was no more logic in his mind, only a rage he held burning inside him as he eyed the troll that took her from him. 

"I don't know!" Terezi shouted, stepping away from him. She must have just caught the scent of all the blood he had painted himself with. All the death that happened in her absence, all the fear stench that clung to him from his own prey.

"BITCH, YOU DO!" He screamed before he lunged at her. She darted back away just as easily as he had from Nepeta earlier. He swung large arcing blows, only managing to get a few to actually connect. He had finally started to tire out from the emotional trauma when he heard the door open again. 

Out stepped Karkat, Kanaya, and Sollux. His eyes darted back to Vriska's body. He moved back to guard it as everyone on the roof prepared for a deadly 5x showdown. He took in his options and he realized he didn't have any. He kept his eyes on Karkat as everyone took a step back. The angry little troll lifted his sickle and ran at Gamzee. He could see hesitation in his actions though, and Gamzee decided to throw the fight he could have easily won to prevent the fight he would have lost afterwards. He jumped forward, growling. As he lifted a club up, Karkat dropped his weapon and shooshpapped him. 

If this had been any other time, he would have laughed. The troll he used to hold up on a pedestal finally acknowledged him. But instead he played along, letting Karkat think he had lulled him into a calm submissiveness again after a bit of a half-hearted struggle. The stand off lost the last of its fire as Gamzee held onto Karkat tightly. He bit his lip as he let him pat and shoosh him, but he kept his eyes on Vriska's body. He made sure no one touched her, and when everything was done, he carried her body carefully inside and to a refrigerator. He made sure all the bodies were stored so they wouldn’t rot and stink, but he took extra care of his matesprit.

That was the last time he saw her in the waking world, and he would remember it forever. He would avenge her.


	10. Chapter 10

As soon as the dream bubbles were created, he spent a lot of time asleep. When he wasn't at mandatory meetings with Karkat, or eating food, he was asleep in Vriska's room. Everyone knew she'd been his matesprit now, so he didn't bother trying to hide the fact anymore. He spent his waking hours reflecting on all he'd lost, sitting in front of a shrine he'd built for her. But when he slept, he was full of hope. 

He spent many hours looking through bubbles, tracking down every instance of her. Which each new Vriska he met, he fell more under her spell. But he still hadn't found his Vriska, the one that shared all their memories and all their love. 

Then one night, in a bubble made of the memories of the beach he lived on, he found her. He'd given up and chosen to sit at the edge of the water, watching the waves wash up onto the soft pale sand of the shore. He heard a voice, and looked up and around. Rectangular pupils adjusted as he looked for the sound, a voice he realized. It was familiar. The realization slammed home and he scrambled onto his feet in time to be tackled flat to the beach.

He knew the weight of the troll on him, and he opened his eyes again to gaze warmly at his favorite smile. She laughed and hugged onto him, and he sat up to pull her back and press gentle kisses along her face in return. They settled down with their forehead pressed together, and he gazed into her white blank eyes. He could just make out where her pupils had been, and she seemed more relaxed than she'd been in sweeps. 

"I missed you..." She followed the whispered confession with a kiss and he returned it. 

"I'm sorry I didn't motherfuckin get there soon enough. I fuckin ache without you there with me." He confessed back, and she punched his shoulder. 

"Quit crying like a mope. I need you to do something for me." Vriska chimed in, her little way of telling him to suck it up but she felt the same.

"What's that?" He asked, smile across his lips. He was game. He always was. 

"Make her pay." She hissed, muscles tense and rigid as she showed him the cold anger burning in her soul. Then she let out a breath and settled back against his chest. He held her close as he plotted quietly in his head. When he awoke again without her in his arms, he curled up and let himself cry quietly for a bit about the emptiness he felt.

Within days, he was working on putting his plan into play.


	11. Chapter 11

He'd gotten stronger again with his visits with Vriska. He slowly stopped going to feelings jams with Karkat. Stopped making up stories to feed the other’s desperate need to be a hero. He also wanted to stop dodging the subject of him and Vriska, because even in her death he honored her request of privacy. Everyone believed he was sober and stable now, still not catching to the fact he’d always been sober. Them finding out he'd killed the pair of moirails didn't make him favorable, but they all called it a circumstance of his triggered highblood rage. He didn't try to contradict them, and they slowly dropped their defenses around him once again. 

Then he started in on his plan. He traveled the meteor using the air vents, and he learned the lay out and the quickest routes easy. He then worked on learning Terezi's every move, and he watched her from the vents as she spoke and ate and read. She was fine for a while, keeping a routine. He often left if Dave showed up, because their red affections stirred something up in him he didn't want to get started. 

And then she started staring into space, and he knew it was almost time. She got apathetic and her high energy slowed. In the few times he saw her in dreambubbles and followed her, he found her at her hive staring at old flarping gear her memories had conjured. She was starting to really feel the guilt. 

The first time he saw her cry was awake on the meteor. He climbed out of the vent into her dark room as soon as he heard the sniffling. He knew she'd be alone for a while. It was the moment. 

"Boohoohoo, poor little teal girl killed her best friend." Gamzee whispered into the room, grinning when she sobbed loudly. He moved closer to her slowly. He could see around the room from the glow of the various useless technology they had here. "What do you wanna motherfuckin do it about it, hmmmm?" 

"It isn't fair..." He was greeted with silence until he finally heard her voice. It still felt like nails dragging along a chalkboard to him when she spoke, but the tone of broken timidity it had taken made his heart twist. A deep rooted pity that he smothered. He wouldn't show her kindness of any kind. She took Vriska from him. She took his light.

"Nah. Naw, it’s not fair is it? Ain't nothing motherfuckin fair about any of this shit." He kept his voice in a soft, sing-songy tone. He had to bite back the growls and the anger being near her provoked in him. 

"If she'd just listened--" Terezi started, but he snapped his reply out over hers. 

"Don't give none of that hoofbeastshit. You should have all up and gotten your listen on at our fine fairy sister. Y’all could've reached an agreement." He said, before lifting his hand up and mimed slicing his throat. He knew there was a scar there from his god tier death. Vriska had always stated she'd gotten the angle just right so it wasn't jagged. "Instead, you gutted her. Couldn't even made it her blood pusher so it'd been fast. Nah, right there in her lungs. They collapsed as she told me she motherfuckin LOVED ME." 

He shouted the last two words and he saw her flinch. It brought a wicked grin to his face as he closed the gap between them. He settled a gentle hand on her cheek, and he could see her hesitate before she leaned into it. He felt a pulse of hatred and he grabbed her by her hair and hauled her forward so her face was close to his. 

"I know what you want, what you motherfuckin need...that tug deep down in your soul..." His other hand lifted to trace faint claw marks down her neck. "You wanna be punished, don't you motherfucker?" 

His eyes glowed a faint purple as he worked at her emotions with a combination of his chucklevoodoos and his bard of rage abilities. He brought the thought of punishment forward in her mind like some great big revelation. Her eyes took on that same glow as they widened and she started crying again. He laughed when she started nodding. He let her mind go before he grinned at her. 

"I can do motherfuckin do that. You killed my matesprit, tealbitch. I got lots of punishment to give you. Maybe I could even enlighten you to the goddamn truth." He grinned that wicked grin again as he got comfortable. “It’s what you deserve, after all.”


	12. Chapter 12

It'd been a long tedious process, but he did it. He spent his waking hours with Terezi now, twisting lies and truths into sharp barbs he shoved into her sides. Slowly but surely, she started neglecting her friends in favor of their own kind of jam sessions. 

He'd broken her spirit, even ridiculed her enough that she let Aranea heal her eyes. He knew that would sever the last tie she had with her lusus, and it made him giddy with joy that she'd caved so easily whenever the memory struck him. He left her with more scars and bruises with each time they were together. 

Though she looked so pitiful sometimes, he would hesitate and press gentle kisses to rough bruises. He growled the entire time, and he hated her more than anything else in his entire existence. But no one could touch her but him. He'd made sure of it, following her closely or watching her from the vents. He'd backed down an angry Dave and Karkat on more than one occasion, looming over her and growling like the large protective beast he was. They'd yell at her, and she'd flinch. Then he was throwing claws out at them, deafening roars released at them as he snapped his teeth and chased them off. 

He'd settle back down with her, tell her how no one could understand her like he did. She nodded quietly along, smiling as she let herself fall for his forced security and backhanded kindness time and time again. She was so easy to fold and manipulate, to twist and break. And the more time he spent around her, the more he didn't mind her silent company. 

Bit when he slept, he escaped to Vriska. They'd created a life there, building onto his manufactured dream. He tell her how he ruined Terezi that day, and they'd laugh and mock her together. Then they'd forget about anything besides them. Their world was soft kisses and tender touches, words of love traveling on the wind as he gave her every bit of love he had in him. Every nights sleep was easy, and he awoke warm and happy in his pile the next morning.   
Eventually though, he grew more and more bored with Terezi. He'd long since enacted his revenge and completed his goal, and each day grew tedious. Food became tasteless, and he no longer found any joy in the waking world. More than once the thought of ending it all made the most sense. But he had god tiered. He knew how it worked now; suicide wasn't an option unless the game counted it as just or heroic. 

He was stuck here, with a troll he'd slowly grown to tolerate and even appreciate a little, but without his light to brighten his dower moods it all just seemed a waste. His world seemed so desolate and grey now, he'd forgotten what color felt like. He took sleeping pills to sleep more, to stay with Vriska even just a second longer. 

One night, when he joined her back in their hive, he saw that same old cocky grin on her face from long sweeps gone by. She had a plan. He felt the color slowly returning to his world as she told him about gathering an army of ghosts and of winning this once and for all. She’d been busy while he was gone in the waking world.

Then she told him about a ring in the bubbles that could bring someone back to life and his face lit up. They set about to scheming and he woke with a new drive and goals given to him by someone he trusted more than even himself. 

He could bring her back. He just had to make everyone listen to him first. He didn’t care if history repeated itself. They’d win this, or they’d be together forever. Either outcome worked fine for him.


End file.
